well, i officially started looking at homes this weekend. wow, there are so many out there in the area i am looking in. of course everything is a little more expensive than i can afford. as i am looking i realize that when kaki asks me what i think about them that i am the only person she is asking. i am the decision maker here...me. that hit me today because i guess sometimes i still think there is this other person who can come in and contradict me or not feel the same. because honestly, richie always made the big decisions. i didn't want the home we bought. i wanted the newer one down the street. but no, richie wanted this one and honestly, we kind of always did what richie wanted if he put his foot down. i love my home though and i am so thankful we had it together.
as i look at the homes i get confused...old or new...which is truly better? the old ones have such personality and a "home" feel. but they require a lot of work and since it is just me now i just don't know if i can handle an older home on my own. but of course, the new ones are more expensive so i am having to make decisions about down payments and other things that i never thought i would have to think about. its stressful because i hate thinking about money and worrying about trying to make it all work.
so...i'm moving forward and its hard but there is also a feeling of accomplishment as i work towards selling my home and moving into a new one.
and with that...i'm off to touch up the walls around here and then i have to buy a new microwave.
god, thanks for looking out for me and i ask you to please give me some of richie's common sense and financial sense to make the right decisions. i want to make him proud and right now i am just not sure in which direction to go with a home? new or old?
Footprints
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