Wow, I just realized how long its been since I have written on here. I guess its about time to put some things down in writing that I have learned in the course of the last three years.
As I approach the year 3 mark so many things come to mind...all the advice I got from my friends and family helped but I realize now just how much the widows I met did. Along the way, these men and women traveled the road with me and I look back now and see that I never really was alone because they were all there with me. I am so thankful for that.
I've also learned that along the way you gain and lose a friend along the way. When I look at my life now I see that the true friends are all still surrounding me and are a part of this new life I have with John. They never judged or honestly, never really did much but be there for me. Jill, Amy, Veronica, these girls never wavered and never once tried to stop me as I took wrong turns here or there because they genuinely understood that I would find my way.
I am so thankful for all the support I've had not only with my grief but of my building of a new life and my relationship with John. That boy truly has never left my side. Yes we had our ups and downs and were judged and talked about by so many, but only God knows how hard it was to begin dating after Richie, but for John to fall in love with me and to never give up on us even in our darkest of times...well, I know why I love him so much. He took a chance on me and I took a leap of faith that God had sent me what I had been praying for- someone to love me and be willing to be my partner for the rest of my life. I truly love my best friend...and I am so glad that I didn't listen to any of the negativity and that I trusted not only my heart but those around me that truly had my best interests at heart.
Life is amazing...and I am along for the ride for as long as God has planned for me. Richie, I know that you are proud of me- for so many reasons-for being strong when all I wanted to do was give up and walk away, for trusting love again, for fighting for what I believe in, for standing up for myself and doing what was best for ME when it was importatnt to put myself first.
Richie, thank you for helping shape my life into what it is today. I am a better person and I hope that all my family, friends and John can all see just how much I cherish them and love them for who they are- my lifelines.
Life is amazing...enjoy it...savor it...and remember, do things that allow you to look in the mirror and smile at how proud you are of yourself.
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