June 24, 1974

That was 33 years ago this Sunday. Wow, 33 years ago I was a small little baby with no idea just how many curves life was going to throw me. I was the only one of us that my dad was at the birth. He was on a trip for both Michelle and Laurie's birthdays. Maybe that is why even though we fight, I am daddy's little girl?

This is the year before I turn 34, the age Richie was when he died. I've been told that this year will be a good one because its been a year since he died but it will also be hard because I will have the mixed feelings of turning the age he was when he died next year. What a crazy mixture of feelings for one person to have to work through.

I'm stronger this week than I was a year ago. Last year I spent the week planning a birthday night but really not sure how or what I would feel that day. This year I am a little more clear headed and I feel as if I will have a good time. We girls have a suite at one of my hotels downtown. We are going to do a pool day there then have some dinner then hit the town. I'm nervous...maybe its because I am scared I will cry again like last year? I don't think I will but then again, crying for me is something I have no control of over anymore.

Richie, I will miss you at my birthday this year...even though in the past you didn't always make my birthday a priority or well, you know what you did...but I wish you were here to at least hug me and celebrate another year on this earth.