When Richie died I can't tell you how many people...friends and family told me, "Oh, one day you will meet someone that will make you happy and after going through all of this you will 'just know' that that person is the one." I was told so many times that what Ihad been through would help me figure out what it was I really wanted and needed in the next relationship.
So...here we are, almost 17 months later and I've met someone. I keep thinking of that saying that you hear "when you meet the right person you will know because they bring out the best in you." I understand now what that means. John is such an amazing and caring person. It is hard to put into words how I feel about him. I tried to explain to my mom how I'm older now and that this time around I am a different person going into love. And I know my heart well enough to know that it wouldn't go down this road unless what I felt was true. I am in love with him, even after this short amount of time. I know that he is special and I know that what I am feeling for him isn't going to go away anytime soon if it ever does? A 33 years old and as a widow I know that I'm in love.
Now for the point of this...almost everyone close to me has reacted with skeptism. At first they all wanted to know about John and to hear details about us and what was going on but as this has gotten serious faster than what they think is "appropriate" they are reacting with complete skeptism. When I told my mom that this was real I swear, I think I heard crickets...then I was told, "Well, just wait and see where it goes." I guess I thought that I was going to get some sort of happy reaction because after 17 months of rebuilding my life I have met someone and am very happy.
I just don't get it...when I asked her, my sister and the others why they are skeptical I have been told its that they are protective of me. That's great...I completely understand it but why can't the first reaction be happy...they later, between themselves they share their worries? Why do they have to tell me or let me know they are skeptical.
I guess I just wish they understood that their doubts come off as negative. The one positive thing though that I do have is my friends...they all love John and are happy for us. Yes, they are protective and worry about me, but they also trust me and know that in the last year, with the odds not always on my side, I've made good decisions. They've watched me think things through, stay true to myself and take things as they come. Maybe if others would think before they react to my news they would have time to remember all of that as well.
But for now, I'm in love again and wherever it does go...I am glad I took the chance to try it again.
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I'm glad you've found someone, who makes you glow from within. That's amazing and a blessing. Don't be too hard on your family. Not everyone will be exactly the way you expect when life changes. They're just wanting to keep you from getting hurt again. I think you know your own heart and that of your boyfriends, and am so happy for you that you found someone deserving of you. But until you're family sees that he 'is' deserving of you...they're going to keep the idea at arms length. Not just to protect you, but themselves as well. I'm sure they've all grieved for you over the past 17 months too! Now it's a scary thought to think that someone else has the power to break your heart. That is a big burden to carry as a family member, who wants the best for you. It's hard for them to hope...its a leap of faith. They'll get there though...just give them time! They love you and will come around.
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